My View of Things

Blog you should be reading

2009-01-17T15:49:00.004-05:00

Gillian and I started boot camp together in October. This is her blog. Really, you should read it. operationfit.blogspot.com/

Still Alive

2008-10-16T08:23:00.002-05:00

Sorry to leave you hanging.

Boot camp is still kicking my butt, but at least this week I can walk up and down stairs without too much effort. I am still trying to be asleep by 9 which in it's own way makes me an old person.

I have never in my life had this much accountability for my nutrition and fitness. Yesterday, at the senior breakfast, I had a Chick-fil-a chicken biscuit. After exerting major self control on Monday to turn down 5 different offers of chocolate cupcakes, I had no will power left. It smelled too good. And it was so good....

Until this morning that is. I decided not to lie on my food log and I won't make that mistake again. After an hour long, really tough workout that focusing on cardio, core strengthing, and arms, I got my first (and hopefully only, if my conscience will allow a little fib here and there) taste of the encouragement after party. It was terrible.

I may be back to crying up and down stairs tomorrow.

Oh, and as a side note, I didn't mention in my last post that another reason I am doing this is because Scott and I have a bet about who can lose the most before April. It's kind of unfair since he is a boy and all. I mean, all they have to do is eat healthy for 2 weeks, run twice, and they've lost 20 pounds. But I am am stubborn and I am determined to win. If I lose then I have to do some karaoke thing at a Braves' game. But if I win, then Scott has to get rid of all of his flowered Hawaiian shirts. I am so winning.

Seriously, What was I thinking?

2008-10-07T06:50:00.003-05:00

Actually, I know exactly what I was thinking- April 5th, want to look amazing, want the dress to have to be altered down and not up, want to love looking at the pictures. If this isn't enough motivation, then I don't know what would be.

Let me tell you now that I was crazy.

Today was day 2 of Operation Boot Camp. I am getting up at 4:30 to drive to Powder Springs to be tortured by a pair of VERY in-shape guys for an hour every morning.

At 5:15, they start by looking over the log book of what we ate yesterday and chiding us for the bad things we ate. Apparently, starting next week, if we eat something we shouldn't then we have to endure "encouragement" after the normal hour workout. I want no part of any "encouragement."

Following, there is a workout designed to make us wish for death. several times.

People, I have NEVER in my life been this sore. I am walking like a 95 year old with a double hip replacement. I have entertained the idea of asking for an elevator key because the steps to my classroom are suddenly the thing I dread most about school. If my arms didn't hurt so much then I would think that a walker must be nice. I am scared to stay in one position for too long for fear that I won't be able to move when I need too.

I have been down this road before and I do know the soreness brought on by a new exercise program. But, I'm telling you that nothing compares to this.

So, do me a favor. If you see me, tell me that I look amazing. That you can already see a difference. Lie to me. Lie through your teeth. And remind me how amazing I will look on April 5th. If I am going to get through this, I am going to need all the real encouragement that I can get.

Absence

2008-10-02T17:30:00.001-05:00

Yes, I know that it has been a while since I have written. But I am burnt out. Completely.

One the wedding front, things are falling into place. I now have a dress. Bridesmaid's dresses are ready to be ordered. The colors have been decided. We have booked a caterer. (We may have even won a rehearsal dinner!) And today I think that we got the photographer.

I wish that work was as easy as wedding planning.

One Million Can

2008-09-23T08:15:00.002-05:00

You know that for several years, I have been involved with the Passion movement and this summer, I joined Passion on the World Tour to Uganda. Well, there is something new and cool that Passion has launched. It is called OneMillionCan. The idea is that we can change the world each by giving small amounts.

At Passion 07, the 20,000 college students in attendance were challenged to fully fund 8 global projects. In the course of 12 months, they gave over 1 million dollars and that 1 million dollars was used to change lives around the world.

Now the goal is to keep going. There are 7 new causes to support. (Two are with ministries in Uganda!)

So go to onemillioncan.com and watch the video. See if God pulls you to help one of the causes and give.

Wedding on a Budget

2008-09-15T14:36:00.001-05:00

Should I choose, I think that this wedding could be pulled off without some of the major expenses.

Today, I had students offer to sing at the wedding (today's was actually the 3rd student that offered this), be our photographer, and make me a custom wedding dress.

My people

2008-09-12T15:45:00.002-05:00

My favorite class to teach (at least right now) is the Honors Analysis class. I don't know why the name got switched from Pre-Calc to Analysis, but that's what it is. It is a hard course and covers a lot of material. Students usually struggle and then whine when they are not making an A. But the thing that I love about teaching it is that many of these kids are actually having to think in math for the first time ever.

Today, we started discussing the 6 trigonometric functions. You know, sine, cosine, tangent, secant, cosecant, and cotangent. One of my students piped up that secant is her favorite becasue the abbreviation for it is sec and that makes her think of sports and why she needs to do well in math so that she can keep playing. I made the confession that my favorite is cosine because something about the sine function seems like it is the overachiever. And I like to root for the underdog. And I got made fun of, which is completely what I expected.

And then, L. said, "When I was little, I didn't have imaginary friends. I had imaginary numbers." I asked her to eleborate on this. (That sounds fancy. Really I said "What?!?")

And she said that it was true, each number had it's own personality. The number 2- a tomboy. And 6- the goody-goody teacher's pet.

How funny is that? These kids are my kind of people.

The Ring

2008-09-11T07:45:00.003-05:00

Finally, here are some pictures of the ring!

I absolutely love it!

One easy decision

2008-09-11T06:18:00.001-05:00

I can guarentee that this cake will be no where near our wedding:

http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/2008/09/cake-head-diet-aid-killing-appetites.html

Manic Depressive

2008-09-09T17:47:00.003-05:00

Today, I came face to face with what happens when the following things collide:

- extreme lack of sleep

- thoughts of another late school night because of Open House

- 2 classes of underpreforming, ungrateful, poorly behaved ninth graders

- an upper level Honors class that won't give you a break for getting a problem wrong

- a search for a wedding location

I had a meltdown.

Who knew that an engagement would make me manic depressive.

Most Useless Day

2008-09-08T17:20:00.002-05:00

This might be my least productive school day in my teaching career. When I should be thinking about how to best teach finding a logistic regression model, I am thinking about locations.

So here is the question for today: If you were going to get married in April in the Atlanta/LaGrange/Newnan area, where would you have the ceremony? The reception?

The details

2008-09-07T20:02:00.002-05:00

So I was talking to Wendy at dinner tonight and wondering about the best way to share details. I have already talked on the phone way more than normal and I am having a hard time censoring for time's sake. Therefore, I am going to type it here. And if you are getting bored with the story then you can skim it.

The first thing that you should know is that Scott and I have been talking about marriage a whole lot. I knew that he would ask and he was pretty confident that I would say yes. We have even talked about the fact that every time we did something out of the ordinary, I thought that it must be when he was going to propose. And then when it didn't play out the way I had worked it out in my head, I would be a little sad.

You should also know that I am a little bit of a thunder thief. I think that I can read people (and especially Scott) so well that it is impossible for me to be surprised. Scott will want to do something sweet for me, like send flowers to work, and before he can executed his plan, I will say "Hey, it would be so sweet if you sent flowers today." Rightfully, it completely annoys him, but makes me laugh.

So yesterday, I was heading up to Gainesville to help Scott pack for his upcoming move to Atlanta. On Thursday, he told me that he wanted to go to this place on the square for dinner. He said that it was nice and I would need to bring a dress, which was really kind of a bummer because last week was so long and exhausting and all I wanted to do was wear sweats all day. But he was excited about going.

So excited in fact, that I thought "He is totally going to propose tonight." I was so cocky that I wrote it down. Give me some credit for not just telling him up front.

But, the day didn't go as I thought that it would. Scott was (and is) sick and so we spent a few hours at urgent care and then at the pharmacy getting medicine for bronchitis. He also initiated a conversation about how he was nervous about talking to daddy. And he asked a lot of questions about when I would want to get married and how long I would want to be engaged. He completely threw me off the scent and by the time we went to dinner, I was resigned to the fact that it was just another dinner. A nice one, but nothing special.

Dinner was great (www.scottsonthesquare.com) and towards the end of dinner I suggested that we take a walk around the square. It was just so nice outside. And so we walked for about 30 minutes around downtown. Along the way he asked if I thought he was going to propose that night and I fessed up. He asked if I was disappointed that he hadn't and I said that disappointed wasn't the right word because I knew that he would do it at the right time but that this was how it was going to be EVERY time we did something together. I was always going to expect it.

So we made our way back to the middle of the square and we were standing there just enjoying being together. He asked if I was sure that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I jokingly responded with "Are you offering?"

It was then that I felt his heart rate shoot through the roof. He got down on one knee and said some really sweet things, none of which either of us can remember now. I cried. And said yes. The ring that Scott gave me was my grandmother's ring and she passed away at the beginning of the year. It is beautiful and filled with such sweet sentiment. When I realized that he had decided to use this ring, I started crying all over again. Bobbie would be so happy. (I was even wearing yellow, her favorite color on me.)

And so we stayed in the square a while longer just enjoying the moment. The proposal was everything I every wanted: it was so sweet, it was simple, it was private, and it was a surprise. Scott is continuing to amaze me with his ability to make me so happy.

Scott completely floored me. He had been down to talk to daddy over 2 weeks ago. And he had dinner with both of my parents on Wednesday to get the ring. And I had no clue.

We went back to the restaurant to celebrate with a glass of wine and when the owner/chef (who had visited all of the tables during dinner) heard the story, he helped us celebrate by picking up the drink tab.

Today, we went to the Falcon's game with my parents, Rebecca and Josh. It was so nice to be able to see my family and celebrate with them. All day I have been completely giddy and working hard at getting over the weirdness of being engaged. I, who normally never wears rings, am completely in love with wearing this one. Everything right now seems like so much fun just because there is some new sparkle. In fact, I have had to stop a couple of times while typing this to think about how typing is so much more interesting with something shinny on my hand.

While the thought of making all the decisions necessary to planning a wedding makes me want to freak out a little, I am so looking forward to becoming Mrs. Scott Smith.

Stay tuned for episodes. I am sure that there will be many funny stories along the way.

I may have a problem

2008-08-15T18:06:00.002-05:00

I think that I may be a workaholic. Really. My case is as follows:

Monday- 13 hours
Tuesday- 13 hours
Wednesday- 10.5 hours (but would have been longer had Sara not called and asked if I wanted to grab dinner before small group)
Thursday- 11.5 hours
Today- 12.5 and counting (of course, I am using these few moments to blog and so does that really count?)

Other supportive evidence-
I am getting up before 5AM to get to school between 6 and 6:30. I don't mind getting up early, but pre-5AM is not early. It's loony.

It's Friday. Of the first week. You could smell the rubber burning as everyone else peeled out of her at 4. And I am still here.

Swimming hasn't even started!

And here's the thing, I don't know why I have worked so much. Nevertheless, here are my attempts to rationalize:
- I do my absolute best not to take school home with me. I need time away to be a rest.
- Scott has his son this week and so evening dates are out.
- Wendy is out of town and Angela, my friend & other roommate, is also a high school teacher just going back to school.
- It's the first week. It's going to be busy.

I just feel like there is always so much more that needs to be done. As humbly as I can say this, I am a great teacher. You may ask how I know and I just know. But it isn't really me. Honestly, it is evidence of Christ's work through me. Otherwise, there is no way that I would be as patient or as creative. And I certainly wouldn't care as much as I do. And to rest when I know that it could be better kills me.

But I am EXHAUSTED. And it has only been one week. So I am going to work on margin. Putting a time limit on myself. Monday, Sara and I are going to start walking the track at 4:30. We will walk for 30 minutes and if I feel that I absolutely must come back to my room and work, then I will. But I will try my best to just leave it all behind for the day. I am going to start saying no to things. Today, I did manage to delete the email asking for Saturday School Workers and the one asking for a sponsor for the Interact Club. But, I did tell a fellow teacher that I would co-sponsor the Gaming Guild. (It's a sickness people.) I am going to become more protective of my time away from school. No more cramming that full either. Mark my words.

The first step to recovery starts with acknowledging there is a problem, right? Let's hope so.

Day 1 Down

2008-08-11T14:54:00.002-05:00

Day One is over. I am sitting and checking email for the first time all day. I have a love hate relationship with the first day back. Let's start with the bad.

I have some NASTY blisters from wearing real shoes instead of flip flops. My feet and throat hurt. I had all of 10 minutes for lunch and one quick bathroom. The copier acted up 5 times while I was copying my syllabuses. I broke the pull cord on my screen when I tried to pull it down for my first class. I have 65 new students to learn the names of and tomorrow I will have an additional 30. I am just exhausted for being on all day and now I have to spend several hours planning for tomorrow. I worked bell to bell, even during third period which lasted an extra 30 minutes because the lunchrooms were over crowded.

On the good side. I love what I do. High school kids are so unique. Is there ever another time in our life when we are convinced that we know it all but are terrified that someone else will find out that we don't? I love being excited about math and about seeing them get it- even on the first day. This one kid, a freshman nonetheless, told me that my class was the best all day because we did work. Whoa! I love the way that my room is set up. (Thanks, Scott!) I feel like I accomplished something.

When it gets to be October and I have started complaining about needing a break, remind me that I do love this job.

By the way, I think that I did a good job of scaring my pre-calc kids. I sent them off with a smile and homework that is going to be hard!

First Day Jitters

2008-08-10T22:00:00.002-05:00

They never go away. Each year without fail, the night before school starts is a sleepless one for me. I lay in bed and wonder what my students will be like. I wonder if I will have sweet kids or rotten ones. I run through lessons in my head and ponder whether I am teaching it in the order that I should be so that the greatest number of kids can learn the greatest amount of material. Will I have supportive parents or just nosy busy-bodies?

I wonder if by beefing up my pre-calc class if I have made it too hard. Will I lose them on day one and fight all semester to convince them that they can do hard math?

This year, I am teaching a new course- Math 1. Not just new to me, but new to the whole public high school curriculum in the state of Georgia. It is chop full of discovery activities and performance tasks. Designed to make the students better mathematical reasoners. Not as many standards as the old curriculum, but much deeper. Now I wonder if I will be able to find the balance between tasks and lectures.

I am just about finished with my lesson for tomorrow. (I teach, a lot, on the first day. And I give homework.) My lunch is packed. I have my first day outfit picked out. And now I am going to go lie in bed for too few hours staring at the ceiling and being nervous.

A New Blog

2008-08-01T21:20:00.003-05:00

As if I needed a new blog to follow.

But if you know my biggest pet peeve, then you understand why I added this to my google reader feed.

And, have I mentioned how much I love google reader? If you are not using it, then you should be.
I actually think that someone sent me a news article about this blog a while back, but I obviously wasn't using google reader then and so I didn't remember to go check it.

Auld Lang Syne

2008-07-31T19:01:00.000-05:00

I don’t make New Year’s resolutions.

At least, not on January 1^st.

I make my resolutions now. Maybe it’s that I get excited about new school supplies. Maybe it’s that I have been mostly lazy for two months and so I need a change. Maybe it’s that I feel like I get a new start with a fresh slate of kids. Maybe it’s that I am just meant to live on an academic calendar.

Whatever the reason, when August comes, I feel the need to make life changes. And so, here I give you my New (school) Year’s resolutions:

I will be TOTY.
I will be better at parent contact. Wait. If there is anything that I have learned from the numerous educational classes and seminars I have sat through, it is that a goal needs to be measurable. Let’s try again. At least once a month, I will attempt to have contact (phone, in person, or most likely, email) with a parental unit for each student I teach. (Note that if I am successful at this, I am making great strides at achieving goal #1.)
I will run a half-marathon (or the equivalent of one) by August 1, 2009.
I will lose weight. (Yeah, I know that this one as it is currently stated isn’t exactly measurable, but I am NOT posting my weight on a blog.)

I think that there are others, but it is probably be best to keep the list short and manageable. Wish me luck.

Now if only the first day of school came with a balloon drop and champaign toast…

Scott's Birthday

2008-07-23T23:59:00.004-05:00

Yesterday was Scott's birthday. It also happened to be his weekly pool league night. Scott mentioned that he would love it if I would bring cupcakes to pool league. I don't think that he was expecting this:

I used decorating sugar to do the colors and stripes.

The center circle is a Necco wafer with the number done in black frosting.
And the chalk was made from two blue starbursts.

The look on his face was incredible and made the effort worth it. I am already worried that I won't be able to top it next year.

The Road to TOTY 2009

2008-04-28T15:46:00.002-05:00

You know how the presidential campaigning starts way before you would ever expect?

I am going to take a lesson from the candidates and start now. My first step towards TOTY 2009 elections is to volunteer to stay at 8th grade parent night tonight. Doesn't that sound exciting? I get to stand behind a table and answer questions about high school math classes for next year's rising class and their parents.

The campaign begins.

Maybe Next year

2008-04-25T14:05:00.002-05:00

The campaign to be TOTY didn't pay off. I was nominated, but didn't get the votes. Maybe next year.

New Blog

2008-04-14T15:24:00.002-05:00

There are so many things going on right now. I created a new blog to address perhaps the biggest thing. Check it out.

My Family

2007-12-27T18:33:00.000-05:00

We Do like to burn things.

The pile before we started:

The beginning:

Yep, it's right there. See it? Right there.

Pull Melissa, pull. But don't give yourself a black eye.

Three hours later and still going strong:

Beth's Boo Boo

2007-07-12T11:49:00.000-05:00

It's not everyday that I have the desire to post pictures of my thigh on the internet. In fact, that never really happens. But since Rebecca asked, here it is. (I have a suspicion that she only wants to make fun of my klutziness, but oh well.)

Here's the story:
My parents are adding on to their house. Monday evening Daddy and I walked out there to see what the workers accomplished for the day. There is a board (4x10?) that you use to get into the new section since it is like 4 feet off the ground. I had just slipped on a pair of momma's shoes to go out there and going up I was fine.
One the way out Davy was at the bottom of the board waiting for us and as I stepped out on the board, daddy said, "Wait a second Davy, Beth will be down to play with you in just a minute." He didn't realize how quickly I would be down on the ground. The board was damp from earlier rain. My right foot slipped and I twisted off to the right. Most of my body landed in (and demolished) a butterfly bush and my left leg came down on the board.
Blood and tears followed quickly. Daddy insisted that we make a trip to the ER in case I needed a couple of stitches and so that they could clean it out well. No stitches were needed, but they did give me pain medication (which made me throw up all day Tuesday).
Here are the pictures that momma took on Tuesday to send to Rebecca and Melissa:
This this the main group of scratches. The dark part at the top is the section that came close to being deep enough for a few stitches.
This one shows that I managed to get my etire leg. You can sort of see the swelling.

And now for your viewing pleasure, this is what it looks like today:

Gross, huh?

103 Things about me

2007-05-30T15:57:00.000-05:00

For the past two summers I was pretty good about blogging while I was out of the country. I thought that I might give it another try even though I will be here most of the summer.

To get it started, here are 103 things about me that you may or may not have known:

1. I hiccup.
2. A lot.
3. I hate bananas.
4. I love anything chocolate
5. Except chocolate covered bananas
6. I consider myself to be a smart person.
7. And a funny person.
8. And generally a pretty cool person to be around.
9. I’m also surprisingly insecure.
10. Social situations make me nervous.
11. I have a thing for numbers.
12. I love prime numbers.
13. I once made a roommate change our number because it had too many even numbers.
14. My childhood ambition was to be a pediatrician.
15. I failed biology my sophomore year in college.
16. I use to swear that I would never teach. No matter what I did, it wouldn’t be teaching.
17. I just finished my 4th year teaching.
18. I love coffee.
19. I also love skim milk.
20. I usually read 4 books at once.
21. During the summer, I can average a book every 4 days.
22. My family goes to the beach every year.
23. I love vacations with my family.
24. My favorite vacation was the time we went to Louisiana and just drove around. We went on a tour of a rice cake factory.
25. Also, at Thanksgiving and Christmas, we usually go out to the woods and shoot guns at various inanimate objects.
26. I am the oldest of three girls.
27. Most of the time, I like being the oldest.
28. I adore my sisters. And my parents.
29. I can make fun of them, but I will get ticked if you do.
30. My youngest sister moved to Minnesota this year. I miss her.
31. My middle sister is getting married. I miss her too.
32. I am vain about my eyelashes. They are perfect.
33. I sing loudly.
34. I love to bake.
35. I would love to open my own bakery and make cookies all day.
36. My favorite cookies are ginger snaps.
37. 37 is my favorite number.
38. I love to take baths.
39. I love someone playing with my hair.
40. I would pay someone to wash and brush my hair everyday.
41. seriously
42. I love traveling.
43. I have to take anxiety medication to fly.
44. I have been to 6 foreign countries.
45. I am going to go to 2 more this summer.
46. I wouldn’t mind living overseas at some point in my life.
47. I speak a little Chinese.
48. I have a fantastic group of friends.
49. The last time I got angry at someone it was because he called my friends judgmental.
50. I yelled at him.
51. I never yell.
52. I can count on one hand the number of time I have yelled at someone.
53. I avoid conflict if at all possible.
54. I have a hard time saying no if someone asks me to do something. Even if it is inconvenient for me.
55. I am really easy to get along with.
56. Probably because I am a pansy and avoid conflict.
57. I really want people to like me.
58. I want to be described as nice.
59. I am not nice.
60. I screen phone calls.
61. I’m not good at returning phone calls.
62. I don’t like to do things that I am not good at.
63. I am learning to play pool.
64. I am not good at it.
65. I can’t spell.
66. Or type.
67. I wish that I were a good writer.
68. I can’t stand it when people use quotation marks inappropriately.
69. Air quotes are even worse.
70. I love Sunday afternoon naps.
71. especially in the summer when it’s hot outside and the sheets are cool
72. I am pretty independent.
73. My greatest fear is being alone the rest of my life.
74. I am dating an amazing man.
75. I have flat feet.
76. I had to wear corrective shoes as a child.
77. If I stand for too long, it makes my knees hurt.
78. I wear a digital watch.
79. It drives my mom crazy.
80. But not as much as the rubber band I wear on my other wrist.
81. I am a bit of a dork.
82. I like to think that you wouldn’t realize it by looking at me.
83. I suspect that I am wrong.
84. On a daily basis, I read the blogs of several people I don’t know.
85. I recently found out that my boyfriend knows one of the girls I blog stalk.
86. I am a little jealous that he knows her and I don’t.
87. And a little worried that if he starts reading her blog, he will like her more than me.
88. Did I mention that I am surprisingly insecure?
89. My favorite flowers are daffodils but they make my sinuses go crazy.
90. I hate running but I try to like it.
91. I took about 12 years of piano lessons but I know I can’t play a piece all the way through.
92. I also played the trumpet but wish I played the cello.
93. I like to have conversations when I am tired because my barriers are down and I will really say what is on my mind.
94. I am more of a morning person. I get much more done in the morning.
95. There are days in the summer when I don’t get out of my pajamas.
96. Or if I am at home home, out of my bathing suit.
97. I hate to do laundry.
98. I will wear clothes dirty.
99. The jeans I am wearing now are dirty.
100. I am going to start to blog more.
101. Like the summers when I was in Asia.
102. I probably will forget to blog by next week.
103. I am glad not to be in Asia this summer.

2006-11-03T15:42:00.000-05:00

I like teaching. Really I do.

And I like high school. I remember the fun stuff that wasn't learning and so I recognize how important that kind of thing is. That is why today I dumped my geometry plans to review sine, cosine and tangents in favor of taking my classes to the auditorium to watch the One Act Play. (Plus, who really wants to try to fight the Homecoming Friday Hype in order to review trig functions?)

But just now one of my trig students came in to critique my teaching. He means well, but I don't think he has a clue as to how badly he hurt my feelings. And it isn't that he was wrong in what he said. On the contrary, he was far too spot on. He accused me of not being personal enough and pushing them too hard. (In turn, I accused him and the class at whole of always misbehaving and not putting forth a valid effort.) And he is right.

I like teaching, but there are some days I hate me the teacher.

I hate being stern. I hate threatening to call home. I hate pleading with students to try. I hate being forced to cut out the fun things of high school because they can't behave during the non-fun parts.

Thank goodness it is Friday afternoon and I don't have to be me the teacher until Monday.