My Life is a Comic Strip

For years now I have been reading the comic strip “For Better or For Worse”.  Not only on Sundays.  Everyday.  Religiously.  Momma and I both read it.  And sometimes we are even dorky enough to talk about it.  (Do you think that the police officer Elly met will go track down Elizabeth?)

I relate with Elizabeth.  One she shares my name.  Also, I like the fact that she is the eldest of the Patterson daughters, a teacher, and still single.  A few years ago, momma gave me a framed copy of one of the Sunday strips.  Elizabeth was away at college and sick.  The radio was playing advertisements for cold medicines.  She kept switching the station and got more commercials:

“….cold and allergy you will be…”

static static static

“…for every symptom.  May cause drowsiness, blurred vision…”

static static static

“…under the weather?  Just call…”

click of the radio being turned off.

The final frame shows Elizabeth with the phone to her ear and she is saying, “Hey mom, I don’t feel good.”

That is so me.

But really, I didn’t think that my life would continue to parallel that of a cartoon drawing.  That is, until we moved.

Right now, one of the story lines is that Michael Patterson (the eldest of the Patterson offspring), his wife and their 2 kids are living above extremely obnoxious neighbors.

This is so us.

I don’t know a lot about our neighbors.  I don’t even know their names.  What I do know is that EVERY night, someone next door decides to play music with the bass turned all the way up.  I am beginning to think that he (or she?) might be an aspiring musician, because last night, I heard the same 8 measures of base line for about 45 minutes.  I could sing it to you right now. He would play it for a minute and a half and then there would be silence.  And then it would start again.  Over and Over and Over.

For 45 minutes at 10:30 PM.

I am not exaggerating at all when I say that at one point, with tears of frustration welling up in the corners of my eyes, I had my fingers in my ears, and my head under three pillows.  It didn’t help.  Rather, it was much like the experience of putting your head under water in the bathtub.  Some sounds are muffled, but the low tones just seem to be intensified.

And when it stops I think that if only I can fall asleep before it starts again, then I will be fine.  (Is it possible to sleep through the thumping?)  Like when someone in the room is snoring and they roll over- sweet relief as long as you can get to sleep before they start back.  Wednesday night, our neighbor decided to call it quits at about 11:30 PM.  But he must have had a moment of inspiration in the middle of the night because the continuous “THUD THUMP THUD” awakened me at 4AM (!)

They (He/She/Whoever is dwelling next door) are going to push me over the edge.

In the comic strip, Michel writes freelance for a magazine.  He wrote an article about his annoying neighbors and it got published in a magazine.  The neighbors read it and after some threats of lawsuits, it looks like the obnoxious neighbors are about to move.

Please let my life parallel that last part too.